Another week started

hey all!

Sorry to have missed out a couple of days interim but been out of sorts a bit.

work goes on in the same pace as does life at home. Nothing changed so far but then maybe i have. I must admit, am the kind of person who i think indulges in a lot of thinking. While thats good as is the habit of reflevtion, i also realise that too much of introspection and too much of thinking actually leads you to overwork yourself. Result is that you have headaches that are unnecessary and also cook up a lot of baloney for yourself that just leads to complications in the mind and heart.

I also tend to do a lot of this... you know how it is.. think too much, read too much in things that are said and done, build what if scenarios in the head, sometimes it also happens that I manage to read something that is not there or hear something that is not said. All this adds to the muddle in my head and it makes me restless and uneasy.

What is the way out? This is a tough one. I have tried many a times to figure this one out. Am yet to do so. I get upset and insecure and all because of nothing. Or maybe there is something. Maybe am hitting the nail on the head but obviously, as the ways of the world go, its tough for decent people like me (ya, and thats not exaggeration!) to make it known that i have the game figured out.

I have thought about this - something called Detatched Involvement.

Someone I know at work has put forth the concept to me quite some time back. Its about discharging your responsibilities effectively. there will be a max of one or two people in the world who will be able to read your mind, your face and your heart without being driven to. They would know when you are being mechanical and when you do something from the heart. The rest of the world is mildly just interested in all that you do, whether you be happy or not be damned. So the idea is to make them happy. Live upto expectations but never ask for a thing in return. Really, thats what the world wants. believe me, you can survive it.
Krishna, in the Bhagvad Gita advocates Nishkam Karma (Selfless Action) as the ideal path to realize the Truth. Allocated work done without expectations, motives, or thinking about its outcomes tends to purify one's mind and gradually makes an individual fit to see the value of reason and the benefits of renouncing the work itself.

Sometimes, you would end up shriveled and almost dead. I listen to my favourite music at such times. Sometimes, you would feel intensely alone and stripped bare. I hug my mom's photograph close to me at that time. Sometimes, all you want to do is run away. I cry in front of my guru at a time like this. And it works. Releasing inwards. You dont need anyone else really. I have my work and my life to lead. Sometimes there are a dozen people with you and by your side. These are happy times. Sometimes there is noone and you feel as if noone gives a damn. These are bleak times. These are also testing times - faith and self confidence.

I may be right or wrong, am not sure. Maybe others also go through these motions. So then we're even , aren't we?